After I dropped off our children at their schools, and made my visit to my chiropractor appointment, I was finally on my way home when I talked myself into going ahead to make a quick stop to get a few essentials we had run out of: dog & cat food and toilet paper. I called my husband to tell him I would be about fifteen minutes later than I had originally hoped. I reasoned that though I really did not want to squeeze this errand in, it was the wisest and kindest thing to do. Otherwise, we would have to stop in the evening with everyone in the car waiting on me. Looking back now, I am reminded of this verse:
A man's heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.
Proverbs 16:9
Proverbs 16:9
As usual, I had taken longer in Wal-mart than I intended (I still try to convince myself I can run in and out in less than 20 minutes - I even set my Pomodoro timer confident I could make it). By the time I was back in my car, it had been 3 hours since I first left my house that morning. Before I started the car, I noticed hunger pangs and decided to pause to find some food. I had just bought some cutie oranges and I had breakfast that had been refused (an unopened yogurt) in my purse. So, I snapped a photo of these items in my newly downloaded food journal app (See How You Eat) and started to drive.
As I got to the busy intersection, I noticed an older man with his dog. He was holding his sign
"Vet. Hand Up Appreciated."
"Vet. Hand Up Appreciated."
My thoughts went to the judgement that people who need hand outs have no business having expensive pets to take care of. Wait. There it was. Judgement. Not compassion. Not mercy. Not, "Lord, here I am, use me."
So, I rolled down my window and offered him my yogurt. At least I had not opened it yet, and I had a clean plastic spoon to include.
He smiled and said the usual, "God Bless". I thought my usual, "He already has." But, I didn't say it out loud this time.
Sometimes it seems I am encouraging others while at other times the same words can seem like I am boasting.
I turned the corner to go home when the whisper in my thoughts said,
"You have dog food for his dog."
I argued, "How would I give him that?"
"You just happened to also buy ziploc bags."
True. On my way to the pet foods, I impulsively remembered that we had run out of our ziploc collection and I had thoughtfully analyzed and bought all we could possibly need: gallon zipper bags, quart, sandwich, and snack size.
It was obvious, I needed to take the few extra minutes and give his dog some food too.
So, I turned into the gas station on that corner as if I had intended to do that maneuver.
I drove up to the curb; behind where the man was standing facing the traffic.
Judgements came back. I wonder if this nice gray pick up truck is his? After all, he looks dressed fairly nice. Why would he be asking for help? Oh yeah, his cardboard sign said he was a vet. I have heard how our country leaves our veterans hanging. He must just need extra help.
I lightly honked to get his attention.
He turned toward me and came up to me smiling. I told him I had just bought dog food and baggies and could share some food for his dog too.
I did not stop myself. I asked, "Is this your gray truck?"
He replied, "No, I don't know whose it is."
I was obviously wrong in my earlier assumptions and forming conclusions that this man may be trying to take advantage or get free handouts because he could.
He was appreciative and as I opened the hatch and tried to figure out how to open the dog food bag, he was eagerly offering to help.
I won't lie. I wrestled here. In simply choosing which bag of dog food to give him a portion!
I had bought two bags of food in Wal-mart. I had bought a more expensive bag - well...they both were expensive (I try to buy wholesome quality animal food with the belief that their health will deteriorate, as will ours, with all those cheap fillers and preservatives costing us pain, suffering, and more money in vet bills in the end). But, the one sitting on top was the more expensive one. It was as if the whole time I was struggling to figure out a way to open this bag, my mind was telling me, "You should give him the other bag. The less expensive dog food."
I resisted. I determined I would give him the best I had.
(Again, I don't share to boast, but to be transparent that I have been proactively practicing this skill, this gift of giving for ten years now, and I still have to proactively defeat my greedy tendencies, my selfishness, my flesh.)
He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all,
how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?
how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?
Romans 8:32 NKJV
As I was scooping the dog food, he was holding the gallon ziploc bag open for me. When I finished, I looked him straight in the eyes and asked, "What do you need?"
He was taken back by my question. I persisted. "What specifically do you need?"
He replied, "Well, I'm trying to save to get a car."
There it was! A car? God was going to ask me to give up the car we just found and purchased for our daughter. I knew it! I had even spoken it out. Just a week earlier, I had found a car for someone else. Although they no longer needed it. The more I thought about the deal, I convinced myself it was a good time to go ahead and get it for our daughter who will be learning to drive soon. Long story short, we had it assessed and concluded it was in great shape at a great price: $6000.00. However, it just seemed to fall in our lap so suddenly and so easily that I had wondered if this gift was not for us, but another one that God would just be passing through us. He does that at times. Though our daughter already is super excited about the car, I had warned her of this possibility and she was so gracious to say she would be okay if that happened (that God would ask us to give it away).
Instead of assuming, I asked another question. "How much are you trying to save?"
"$800.00.... I've already found a van I can use for my upholstry business."
Whew. My insides smiled. I could do $800.00. Our ministry account currently had some stagnant monies sitting in there ready to bless.
I asked if he had a bank account. He said yes. I told him I would like to bless him right then with a check for $1000.00.
His face lit up and he immediately said that the amount would even help him pay the taxes and get insurance and he would be all set up and ready to go.
As I walked to the front of the car, to get my purse, he followed me. He was talking quite a bit. I was half listening as I searched for our ministry checkbook. I try to always carry it with me because we never know when the Lord will ask us to be ready to give. For some reason I could not find it.
Obstacle. I had to make a decision. Be logistical or be compassionate.
If you know me, this is not as easy as it sounds for me. I am the person who gets "paralysis of analysis" syndrome! But, praise God He helps us in our moments of weakness and I was able to quickly decide it was more important to follow through with this blessing, than it was my accounting was perfect. I could just write a personal check and journal the money (with a specific memo of what it was for) when I got home.
As I was writing the check, I still wrestled with my personal information being on the check. My name. My address. My home phone number!
I am giving this to a stranger. Is this safe?
There are times where we must stay in the spirit and not operate according to the rules, regulations, and traditions of this world. When you know that God has spoken and asked you to do something, you know God is with you taking care of all the details. You can rest in your service to Him.
I pressed on to write the check anyway. I tuned into his need. What did he say about his van and a machine?
He had been talking about his plans to use the van to do work as a contractor for a big company who owns thousands of restaurants. My mind was imagining the work trucks that have come to our house all decked out with specialized equipment (like the carpet cleaners).
"What type of machine do you have to get?" I asked suddenly realizing getting his van was not setting him up for success. It was only meeting part of his need.
"A sewing machine." he said to my surprise. That seemed simple.
"Any sewing machine?" I was scanning my brain to think of possibly giving him the nice one we had just bought for our daughter's lessons. The one sitting in the case, in the closet, not being used for months. This could bring this man income.
"No, I need a special one that will do upholstry" he answered.
"How much does that cost?"
"Oh, I don't know. About $500." he said and then quickly added, "I am just telling you my plans, I don't want you to think I'm asking for more..."
Done. I was already writing the check for $1500.00.
I handed it to him and said, "Here is everything you need to get your van and sewing machine so you can do your work."
The man's eyes were red and tears were streaming down his cheeks. He could not contain them.
Our mission to give in such a way that we make people cry (AKA touch their hearts with the love and grace of God through giving to their need) was fulfilled yet again.
His dog had gotten loose, from the pole she was tied to down the hill, and ran up to me sitting in my car. She was so friendly and I pet her as the man and I talked.
He told me something about a couple he lived near that he wanted to teach his trade to; to help them get work. He told me he lived as a hobo after a divorce four years ago. He did not want much, but he liked to help people.
As I was putting my things away, he asked me, "Would you mind praying with me?"
"...be ready always to give an answer to every man
that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you..."
1 Peter 3:15 KJV
that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you..."
1 Peter 3:15 KJV
And so I stood up, touched his arm, and prayed. Not sure all the details, but God's Word teaches us in various ways
"For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour what you ought to say." (Luke 12:12 NKJV)
and I know He did. I was honored to be a part of that Holy moment. That moment where another human being is hearing the message of God's love for them specifically in a real, tangible way.
Yes, God sees you.
Yes, God hears you.
Yes, God has brought rescue to you.
Yes, God uses His other children to help you.
Yes, remain in convenant with your God, and He will take care of all things for you, with you, and through you.
I pulled out my social worker side and asked if he had gotten any help from the government since he was a veteran. Surely, they would not be okay with him living in a tent! Is it that bad that our government has abandoned our veterans that they are homeless?
He told me he had been a part of Vietnam and Panama. He said, "I won't ask for help from my government. I prefer to ask for help from my people."
I asked who his people were and he pointed to all the traffic and the area where he was standing. He repeated, "I would rather get help from my people than my government. If only you knew how bad it was when I came back in '74."
Unfortunately, my ignorance and lack of education in this area does not understand much about his experiences. I just accepted his position; though it made me skeptical that he can live well off the help from "his people".
I added my typical encouragement to tithe off the blessing he had just been given, as an act of faith and a statement of his trust in God's ability to continue to provide for him. He entertained my pleas with his statements that he liked to help people, that was how he tithes to God and that he depends on his faith in God. If only I could transfer the years of our testing this financial Biblical principle instantaneously so he would understand how crucial it is to his relationship with God and money. But I believe each man has to receive the truth and exercise it for himself to truly receive the truth in a way that transforms them into future action, change, and outcomes. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit is given to guide us with these operations and growing opportunities.
I invited him to feel welcome to contact us with updates at how things turn out for him. I even stretched and wrote my cell phone number on the check to make it easier for him to text me updates and photos.
He was so excited and said, "You're going to be amazed when you get an update from me. When I show you how I am living... in a tent over there...."
We said our goodbyes. He asked for a hug. Of course.
God in the flesh. Thank you for using me, Jesus.
Thank you that I truly am blessed to be a blessing... to be Your blessing to those around us.
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| Snapped this photo as they walked away. Check cleared our bank that day. Pray for his prosperity. Thank God for ours (yours included). |
